Peace Was Never An Option
by cai-ann
Summary: The humans wanted weapons to stop Shaw, they got them in a way they could never have imagined. Together they will change the world. May your gods have mercy on your soul, because they will have none. an Erik/charles au with Dark!Charles
1. In the begining there was light

A/N: So here goes my first multi-chaptered X-men fiction, this one starts off canon but will end up au. I just want to thank the fandom for all the positive reviews and favourites from my drabble Serenity in Rage (shameless self plug over now). It was thanks to that that I have the courage to put this up so soon.

_Beta reader: _Louise Hargadon – she is Awesome! please go check out her stuff.

Disclaimer: If your confusing me with Stan Lee then we have a problem. Two lines are from 30 Seconds to Mars's- Hurricane, if you can tell me which ones they are you get cookies XP.

Warnings: This will include SLASH in later chapters! don't like then don't read. Will also have dark!Charles so if that's not your thing click back, or if you don't, don't complain when he 'turns'. We all good now?

"_thoughts" _

_**Peace Was Never An Option **_

_**Chapter One:In the beginning there was light.**_

"Would you kill to save a life?"

Charles raises his head from the chess game that had been his point of focus, and now fixes his gaze upon his friend.

"I..." he pauses, searching for the right words. "Maybe. Depending on who's life it would be that I'm saving." He finds he has to make a concious effort to answer him as his equal, not simply with the placating words that he would have used with Raven, Moira or the children if they had asked the same question.

He studies Erik, who appears to be contemplating the game board.

"Would you kill to prove you're right?" Charles doesn't ask Erik the same question, because that answer is laughingly obvious. To his surprise, the taller man leans back from the board and seems to think through his answer before speaking.

"Depends on who I would be killing," he finally answers. Charles knows that it is the truth, without having to look into Erik's mind.

They are the different sides of the same coin. Charles knows this. Erik has seen the worst of the world, and he has seen some of the best. He walks in the light, while Erik embraces the darkness. Even with these vast differences between them, that they are more alike than the others know.

When he had been approached by Agent McTaggert, Charles had never expected to meet anyone like Erik. Finding other mutants was amazing enough - but finding an equal? That was something he had not expected in his entire lifetime.

"Charles?" Erik's voice startles Charles from his thoughts.

"My apologies, my mind wandered without my permission," Charles answers with a smile.

"They must have been very interesting thoughts then, to make your mind wonder so, Telepath," Erik tells him. There is an amused smirk on his face, and Charles knows that his words are not as harsh as they seem.

"I was thinking about you. Well, us, really," Charles explains. The only response that he gets is the lifting of one slender eyebrow. "I mean - when I started on this project, I never thought that I would meet someone like you." He curses himself internally for the stutter at the beginning of that sentence. Of course, Erik knows what he means - why does Charles feel the need to explain himself?

"Someone like me?" Erik repeats. The question has an edge to it that lets Charles know he's treading on very dangerous ground.

Charles is sure to hold his eyes on the others as he answers. "An equal in every way."

Only because he is watching so intently, he sees Erik relax ever so slightly. Charles has to hold a sigh back of relief. He has successfully manoeuvred around one of the many minefields that was just part and parcel of the maelstrom of his closest friend's mind. He may have known Raven longer, but Charles knows that there are things about him that she can never understand, but Erik can. Besides, Raven is more like his sister now, the relationships he has with the two of them can never be compared.

"May I ask you a question Erik?" Charles asks. He feels the exact same trepidation and nervousness as he would imagine one felt when they were about to jump from a third storey window.

"You just did, but you may ask another," Erik replies. There is true amusement in his voice now.

Charles takes a deep breath and asks, "Will you let me in your mind?" He stares at the floor now, and feels so, _so_ stupid for asking. After all, Erik has already shown his dislike of Charles' abilities when used on him.

"Is there something specific that you're looking for, Charles?" Erik asks. While neither a 'yes' or a 'no', the reply gives Charles some hope.

"I want to try something, if I may. I believe that it could help you with your powers," Charles answers. He looks at the other mutant now. Erik's eyes catch his own, and suddenly they are locked as if looking away from each other is impossible. Granted, Charles' definition of that word is rapidly changing with the people that he shares his home.

"Very well."

The words are positive, but the tension is back in Erik's frame. Charles' hand lifts up but, instead of touching his own temple this time, his fingers come to rest on Erik's.

_'Use your powers for me, I want to see something' _Charles doesn't bother speaking aloud. Erik simply starts to manipulate the knife that he always carries on him, leaving it floating in the air. Charles' mind is overwhelmed by the memories that this simple act brings forth. There are memories of rage and pain - but further down, almost hidden, there are also feelings of joy and pride in his control and power. "_Thank you, friend'. _

With a sense of reluctance, Charles lowers his hand and breaks the link between them.

"Did you find what you were looking for Charles?" Erik's words are calm, but there is a hidden meaning there that Charles cannot, for the life of him, figure out.

"I did," Charles replies, deliberately not giving anything away. "May we try something different in the morning with your training?" He can't help the smile that is slowly creeping across his face.

"And this has to do with what you saw in my mind?" Erik asks, not bothering to hide the scepticism in his tone.

"It does," Charles answers. Why these verbal duels entertain Erik so much is beyond him.

"That's all I am going to get from you isn't it?" Erik asks, as he stands up and shakes his head with a wry smile. "I'll see you in the morning, my friend. I hope that it's worth it."

Erik leaves the room with the same feline grace as he had entered, as though he hadn't had as much, or more to drink as Charles has.

When Charles is absolutely sure that Erik's out of hearing range that he replies softly, "Oh it will be Erik."

A/N: Reviews please? The more reviews I get the quicker I update.


	2. In the shadows of night

A/n: I was soo blown away from all the responses that I got for the first chapter so here is chapter two (much faster than usual, don't get used to it). Since I first started writing fan-fiction it has always been my dream too have a story reach one hundred reviews, so I ask you fans of First class will you help me?.

Beta: Louise Haragaon- one again you have been amazing, Thank you for everything.

Disclaimer: If I had Charles's power I would so make Marvel give me the rights to X-men but I don't, so no rights for me. *pouts*

Warnings: Same as last chapter, but with a bit more slash in this one.

_**Peace Was Never An Option**_

_**Chapter Two: In the Shadows of the Night **_

Erik is standing in the dark, watching the rain run down the window pane when the telepath finally finds him. Charles had been awakened by a dream. Not a dream, exactly, more a memory of a rain made of ashes. The stomach-churning scent of the burning bodies still scorches his nostrils whenever he thinks about it.

"Have you ever wondered if maybe we should just let the world burn?" Erik doesn't look away from the darkness outside as he asks the question.

"You don't really mean that, my friend," Charles replies, trying to keep a jovial tone in his voice. He joins him by the window. The dark mass of the satellite is barely visible through the storm, and Charles has an irrational thought that the weather was reacting to the other man's dark thoughts. The scene reminds him of a little girl he saw when he had operated Cerebro for the first time. A black girl with hair the same colour as white gold - she has power over the weather. He briefly wonders if they'll ever meet.

"You need sleep Erik. Things will look better in the light of day," Charles finally breaks the silence, attempting once again to put off a conversation that he isn't sure that he's ready for.

When he realises that Erik has no intention of making a move, he settles more comfortably against the wall and watches the man that he is proud to call a friend. Erik seems to be deep in thought, but Charles waits for him to make the first move. It still feels like they're playing chess against each other - but a far more dangerous version now.

"Do you know what this is?" Erik suddenly asks. The words are accompanied by a coin that floats gently up to Charles from Erik's hand. The coin is spinning slowly, lazily, but Charles knows that there is nothing gentle or lazy about this conversation any more.

Charles swallows hard before he replies. "Yes, I know what it is Erik."

The coin makes its way back into the taller man's hand before he can speak again.

"It's a promise to those that you loved. That you love," he finishes. He doesn't need to be a telepath to know that he is now treading on _very _thin ice.

"Will you stop me from keeping that promise?" Erik asks. He speaks in a quiet and calm voice - but Charles knows that if he answers wrongly then the man that he finds himself caring for more and more will be gone without a trace.

"No. I won't, but I do need to ask something from you in return," he finally answers.

Erik finally turns to face him. "And that is?"

"That I deal with any issues that may come up with the humans," Charles responds, looking straight into Erik's eyes now. God! He feels stupid for even thinking it - but they are like a deep ocean , filled with the shadows of things lurking in the deep.

"Very well Charles, but know this. If they turn on me I will protect myself," Erik agrees. Charles knows that he is asking a lot. After all - Erik knows all too well what so-called 'humanity' is capable of.

"A reasonable enough request, do we have an accord?" Charles asks, holding out his hand.

"We do" The next thing that Charles is aware of is the fact that Erik's mind is right there, so close to his that their minds feel as though they are overlapping.

He becomes so distracted by the fact Erik's mind - a mind that is usually so guarded - is suddenly totally open to him, that he doesn't register that fact that Erik has pressed his lips against his own until the other mutant has pulled back and looks at him, almost challenging him to protest against what just happened.

Charles doesn't quite know how to react. He has never thought of another man that way. Ever. His eyes frantically search Erik's face, trying to find a clue as to what made Erik do it. For the first time in his life, he is too afraid to look into someone else's mind, in case he doesn't like what he finds in there - or, and he really didn't know if this was worse - in case he _does _like what he finds.

Before he can say or do anything though, Erik has already faded back into the shadows of the mansion.

Charles looks one last time through the window at the fuzzy outline of the satellite. He raises his eyebrows and lets out a breath that he hadn't realised he was holding.

_"Yes. Training tomorrow will be very interesting indeed,"_ he thinks, almost unaware of the slight smile that flits across his face.

_xmenxmenxmen_

He is halfway back to his own room when he quite literally runs into Moira.

"My apologies, I should learn to be more aware of my surroundings," he begins with a brief smile.

"It's quite all right Charles. After all, I should have been looking where I was going too," the agent responds with a little laugh. "What are you doing up this late anyway? I would have thought that training the children would be very tiring. I know that training new recruits always tired me out," she asks, a smile on her face as though she was remembering pleasant memories.

"Just checking that everything is all right down here before I head to bed," he explains. Charles wonders why his first instinct is to lie to her about what he was doing. He rationalises that the dreams - no, memories - are Erik's story to tell her, if he wishes.

"And you? Is there something I can help you with? It must be past two o'clock in the morning by now," he offers. In truth, he just wants to go to bed, but if there is something wrong he would like to help her.

"No everything is fine, I was just checking in with my superior. I check in at random times so it is harder for them to pin point a time zone," she answers, smiling reassuringly up at him - but there is a darkness to her mind that was not there earlier. Charles has to remind himself that looking into her mind without permission is against his morals.

"I didn't realise that you were checking in regularly," he answers, carefully. If Shaw finds out where they are before the children are ready, it will be a nightmare made real.

"Relax Charles, the line is secured and it's only once a week, always random times and days. No one is going to get our location from that," Moira reassures him. "I'm just letting him know that I'm still alive and that you haven't kidnapped me," she adds with a chuckle.

"Perfectly understandable, Moira. Now if you don't mind I think it would be best if I got some rest before training tomorrow," Charles answers, excusing himself from continuing their conversation.

"Of course Charles, that sounds like a good idea," Moira agrees, yawning herself. "I will see you in the morning."

"Goodnight, Moira," Charles responds, as the two head back to their respective rooms.

A/N: so what did you think? Want the next chapter _now? _Then review XD – Cai-ann


	3. Fear of the Dark

A/N: As I update this 114 emails went out and I just wanted to thank you all so much for the support and feedback :). We're starting to get into the plot now(yay Plot!).I hope that you all like my little offering to you.

Beta: Louise Hargadon- once again thanks for all the work you put into this.

Warnings: Here there be angst... and drama...and slash... well you get the picture.

_**Peace Was Never An Option**_

_**Chapter Three: It's Not the Darkness You Need to be Afraid of, It's What's In It.**_

Breakfast the next morning is a rather unusual affair. Moira is far more quiet and reserved than normal and once again Charles has to remind himself that using his abilities on someone - especially a human - without permission is wrong, no matter what excuses his mind could come up with.

To his disappointment, he sees that Erik is not at the table when he walks into the dining room. Charles is later than normal himself, after a night of tossing and turning as his mind had refused to shut down. He only receives a strange look in reply from Raven when he asks if any of the others have seen him. As she doesn't say anything, he presumes that her response is simply because if any of the group know what Erik is doing, it is usually him.

"I think he said something about a perimeter check? Whatever that is," Sean speaks up, with a red tint to his cheeks.

"That man is more paranoid than my boss, and that's saying something," Moira mutters. Even though the comment is barely audible, he still hears the biting tone in the agent's voice.

"I think, after everything that Erik has been through, his 'paranoia' is more than understandable, Moira," Charles snaps. His tone is one he has never used around the children before.

"I... of course, Charles. I should have thought before I said anything, I apologise," the CIA agent responds, ducking her head down in embarrassment.

Why a simple comment has made him react this way, Charles doesn't know. If it had been directed at one of the children - or even himself - he knows that he wouldn't have blown up like that, but there is something about Erik that makes him protective. It is amusing for Charles to think of Erik that way, because there are few people who need protecting less than Erik. He reigns in his temper.

"No, no. I should be the one apologising, Moira. I don't know what got hold of me," he reassures her. He sends a shaky grin her way and ignores the strange look that Raven has again given him.

"So, what's the plan for today, Professor?" Alex asks, suddenly. Charles knows that Alex is attempting to lighten the atmosphere and goes along with it gladly.

"Well, today I want to work on teamwork and fighting as a group," Charles answers. The telepath lets the children's excited questions flood around him. There will be time for him and Erik to talk later.

_xmenxmenxmen_

It is after lunch by the time he finally gets to talk to Erik for more than a passing moment without anyone else nearby.

"Erik, please. We need to talk," Charles tries to keep his voice calm, but with his heart seemingly racing a hundred miles an hour he finds it very difficult to do just that.

"There is nothing to talk about, Charles. I lost control for a moment. It will not happen again, I assure you." Erik doesn't even look at him as they walk back towards the mansion after helping Sean learn how to fly.

"Erik, please. Just... look at me," Charles begs. In desperation the telepath reaches out his hand and grasps the other's arm, pulling it until Erik finally looks at him. However, there is nothing in the other man's expression that Charles can use to help him to work out why he is acting like this.

"At least tell me why you did it. Don't I deserve that much?" he demands. The expression on Erik's face is something that Charles has never wanted to be the cause of. Pain.

The taller man closes his eyes and sighs. "You deserve so much more than that, Charles," he tells him in a barely audible whisper. He quickly gathers his emotions together, steels himself and continues.

"I acted on an impulse that I should not have, while my guard was down. I let my thoughts run away with me. Once again, I apologise for it - and I hope that our friendship can survive this. Or, if it cannot. I hope that at least you do not hate me." It seems that Erik is looking everywhere but at Charles.

As he finishes a sinking feeling settls in Charles stomach. It is clear that the other mutant has taken his shock last night as something else - something negative.

"Oh Erik, what we have is much stronger than that!" Charles exclaims. He is surprised to notice a tear running down his cheek, even though he is smiling. "I hope in time that you will realise that nothing you could say or do will make me hate you," he promises.

Erik laughs at this, a cold, mirthless laugh that sends shivers up Charles' spine. "I wouldn't say that if I were you. You have no idea of what I am capable of, what I can do. I am what my creator wanted. The only problem with creating a weapon is that you best be careful that you don't end up with a double edged blade," he answers. There is a darkness, a sense of danger in Erik's voice that Charles has never heard before.

"I know you Erik, I know that you will never hurt me on purpose. Yes, there is darkness and rage in you - but there is also light and love. Why won't you let yourself have a chance at that?" Charles holds out his hand to him - a silent plea.

"Because everyone that I care for dies. They die because of me." Erik is crying silently now too.

"What? No Erik, no. It was never your fault, despite what Shaw tried to drill into you." Charles' hand has fallen to his side but his mind is racing trying to work out what he can say or do to fix this.

"Don't lie to me Charles!" There is anger in Erik's voice now. "You said it yourself that you know everything about me. All I had to do was move a damn coin and I couldn't even do that!" Erik runs his hand through his hair in frustration.

"Listen to me Erik. You have to forgive yourself, she wouldn't want you to live like this. I may not have had the chance to meet her but I know that much from your memories." Charles knows that he is risking a lot saying that but he can't think of anything else to try.

"I can't Charles. Don't you see? As long as Shaw is alive I have to avenge her, for my sanity if nothing else." The telepath knows that Erik is desperately trying to get him to understand.

"So we never really had a chance then, for peace?" Charles asks. His tone is so, so sad.

"No, peace was never an option," Erik answers, simply. The words break Charles' heart as Erik says them.

"Then why did you kiss me?" Charles asks. His voice is so quiet, but the other man still flinches. Erik is silent for so long that Charles begins to turn away, thinking that his chance at whatever this could have been was gone.

"Because I wanted to know what it was like. What walking in the light felt like before I died," Erik finally answers

The soft,sad voice makes the telepath turn back with hope before he fully processes what the other has said. "Before you die? Erik? Are you sick, is something wrong?" Charles demands. There is panic in his voice and he quickly covers the space between them and catches Erik's hand in his own.

There is a slow, rueful smile on Erik's face. "No, nothing like that Charles," he assures him. He pauses and collects his thoughts before he continues. "I simply have no illusions about surviving the fight with Shaw. That is all."

A/N: Please don't kill me? If you kill me you'll never get the next chapter *sheepish smile*. Reviews make me type faster - it's a proven fact! also FUUUU formatting fail.


	4. Mankind works in mysterious ways

A/N: once again Thank you to everyone that reviewed you have no idea how happy seeing the email alert in my in-box makes me. More plot in this chapter :) with your daily dose of drama too XD. This is the longest chapter I have ever written so I really hope you all like it.

Beta: Louise Haragaon – you're a sweetie. Thanks for all the encouragement that you have given me :)

Disclaimer: Me own this? you're kidding right?

Warnings: Drama and slashy undertones.

_**Peace Was Never An Option**_

_**Chapter Four: Mankind works in mysterious ways**_

"Erik.. I..." for the first time in his adult life Charles is lost for words.

Charles suddenly realises that his mind has reached for Erik's without him realising it, when he feels a whirlpool of emotions and thoughts - some in English others, in German. He makes himself break the connection before he gets anything more than impressions. "My apologies, I didn't mean for that to happen." He can only hope that Erik understands that it wasn't a concious decision.

He hears Erik sigh and looks up to see that the other mutant is pinching the bridge of his nose, as if he's holding back a headache. "Charles," here Erik pauses, seemingly changing his mind on what to say. "Perhaps this is a conversation that would be better somewhere more private?" As though to illustrate the point, all of a sudden Sean is running towards them as fast as he can.

"Alex...training room...fire!" Is all that Charles can make out of Sean's garbled out-of-breath sentence.

"Sean, take a breath. Calm down!" The words are almost a command coming from Erik.

He watches as Sean takes a few deep breaths and then repeats what he said. "Alex set the training room on fire again, but we can't get it out... Sorry?" The fact that Sean actually looks worried sends a shiver down Charles' spine. He and Erik exchange a look before running back to the mansion as fast as they can.

xmenxmenxmen

By the time that they get down to the bunker the fire is merrily blazing away, with everyone staring at it, including - to Charles' surprise - Moira.

"Are you all just going to stand there or were you planning on doing something about it?" The acidic comment is Erik's, and it jump-starts people into action.

"I am so so sorry, I don't know how it happened," Alex is babbling excuses that are so unlike him.

"It's quite alight Alex, I understand." Charles projects soothing thoughts in the teenagers direction. "Now, has anyone tried to do anything to put it out?" he asks to the group in general. He is rewarded by shaking heads from everyone.

"We don't know how to deal with a fire this large," is Raven's comment. This makes Charles pause, because he has just realised that he doesn't, either.

"Really, you would think one of you would know better." Erik's statement seems somehow to be directed at Moira, and she seems to realise it.

"I don't see you putting it out either," the agent replies in a smug tone.

In return Erik rolls his eyes. "Are there air vents in there?" he asks, choosing to ignore Moira.

Charles has to think about it before answering. "Yes, but I can turn them off from out here. Why?"

"Fire can not burn without air," is Erik's answer as he walks over to the lever for the air vents.

"Of course! Of course fire needs to burn oxygen. I should have thought of that!"

It seems that the fire has even drawn Hank out of his lab.

"Alright, the vents are closed," Charles declares, heading back towards the group.

"How are you planning on getting the door closed? You're not fireproof," Moira asks, an ugly kind of glee in her voice. Erik looks at her disparagingly.

"And what is the door made of?" Erik has that same eerie calmness around him as he did when he was in Russia. Charles wonders why Erik is reacting as though Moira is an enemy - they will have to have a talk about that.

It is Alex who responds. "Metal. Oh..."

With a simple wave of his hand, Erik closes the door "Let it burn itself out and cool down before you try to open it," he warns, then begins to walk away

"Erik?"

"Not now Charles!" Erik barks, not slowing his pace or turning around.

However, Charles ignores the warning tone in his voice and follows him. "Yes, now Erik!"

He follows the taller mutant as he ducks into a side room, far enough away from the the others not to be overheard.

"Fine, what is it that you want to talk about?" The biting tone is one that Charles has not had directed at him by Erik before.

"What was that before?" the telepath settles himself against a wall preparing himself for what he has a feeling will turn out to be a ugly conversation.

"What was what? Be specific Charles - I've done a lot of things today," Erik responds, his form mirroring Charles' on the other side of the room.

"You know what I'm talking about, Erik, don't pretend that you don't. Why were you so abrasive with Moira?" Charles finds himself a tad nervous having this talk. Erik - when he wants to be – can be very unnerving, and the dark look in his eyes is not helping.

Erik's cold, dark laugh makes the hairs on the back of Charles' neck stand up. "Ah, yes. Your pet human. Of course that's what this is about," he sneers.

"Pet human? I have never heard anything so disgusting in my life. What has got into you Erik? She is helping us. More than that - I count her as a friend!" He can not believe that he has heard these words from Erik. What is going through his friend's mind?

"Right. Helping us by spying on us and reporting back to her superiors?" Erik shakes his head mockingly. "How can you be so naive?"

"I am hardly naive Erik, I simply have more faith and trust than you," Charles tells him. However, the other mutant's words have shaken him. After all, Moira herself had told him that she checked in with her bosses once a week. Who knows what they talk about? He shakes his head to clear his thoughts, and focuses back on the metal manipulator.

"What is it about her that you dislike so much? Surely there must be more to it than the fact that she is human?" Charles is looking for hope here - and he knows it.

"It could be the fact that she flinches every time I enter a room, or the fact that she won't look me in the eye or even the fact that her hand lands on her weapon every time one of us uses our abilities." Erik's words are cold and angry. "In other words, Charles - she is afraid. Not only of me, she has good reason to fear me, but of the children too. Nothing good ever comes of fear."

Charles takes a moment to study Erik's body language, learning forward to try to make a point but with hands clenched into fists with anger.

"I haven't noticed any of these things." He keeps his voice calm. If Erik is telling the truth, Charles knows that it could mean problems in the future.

All of the tension floods out of Erik's frame as he leans back against the wall and runs a hand through his hair.

"She doesn't do it with you. God knows why - after all, you are possibly the most dangerous of us all." The heat has gone out of his voice, leaving only resignation in its place.

"How do you come to that conclusion? I would have thought that Alex's, or your own power, would be far more dangerous than I could ever be?" Charles is truly confused over the statement.

"Only you, Charles," there is a fond look on Erik's face as he shakes his head. "You can do anything you want, make people change their mind or control them so they have to do want you want them to do. There are so many ways your power could be used that you haven't thought of."

"I've thought of them, but doing any of that is against every moral code I have," Charles explains, but there is a waver to his voice that he sincerely hopes that Erik doesn't notice.

"Really Charles? Raven told me a most interesting story on how you two came to work with the CIA." God damn that smirk on Erik's face! Of course he had noticed the waver!

"I acted rashly, yes - but I believe that I acted for the best, given the options," Charles defends himself.

"You don't need to defend yourself with me Charles. I have done far worse things. I'm not about to start judging you," Erik assures him. The smile sent towards the telepath is bitter, yet still a smile.

" I know" Charles sighs. "To bring this conversation back to where it began - can you at least try to have a talk with the woman? Clear the air, so to speak." He knows that he is asking a lot of Erik with this, but the worst that can happen is for him to say no.

Erik looks at him for a while silently, until at last he asks, "And if it doesn't work? Will you just let it be? Agree to disagree as such?" He is once again pinching the bridge of his nose.

"I will. If you give it a proper attempt," Charles agrees. He smiles at him, knowing the effort that Erik is making with them all. After all, spending 16 years training to kill someone does not generally lead to being fully socially adapted.

xmenxmenxmen

Erik pauses to gather himself before knocking on the CIA agent's door. "Don't break anything," he mutters to himself as he lifts a hand to knock at the door.

"Oh, Erik! Is something wrong?" the agent asks, looking worriedly at him.

"No, Moira. I was simply hoping that we could have a conversation," he answers politely. _Don't react to the fact that she won't look you in the eyes, _he reminds himself as he smiles tightly.

"I... Is Charles with you?" The agent inquires, looking around as though someone else was about to magically appear.

"No, however he did ask me to have a talk with you." The metal manipulator sees no reason to dissemble; Charles is the reason he is here.

The agent seems startled by this but quickly recovers. "Of course, how can I be of service?"

"Perhaps we could do this privately?" Erik turns slightly to look at the three children and Moira following his eyes takes note of them as well. Sean at least has the grace to look embarrassed, while Alex on the other hand simply looks put out by the fact that he was caught - and Raven has the guts to wave at them.

Moira opens the door fully and steps back. "Come in Erik."

He steps in and makes sure that the door is firmly closed before returning his attention to the woman. "Charles asked me to apologise to you for the way I have been acting around you."

"He asked, but you're not going to, are you?" the agent seems to be studying him.

"No. I do not believe that I have done anything to apologise for." The mutant knows that he has to be frank with her, or nothing will come of the conversation.

"Then why are you here?" Moira asks. The agent has now taken a seat on her bed and waves him toward the chair that accompanies the desk.

He takes a seat before trying to explain, "I was hoping that we could work out our differences enough so that we can work together, for the good of the mission."

"The mission - of course. That's why you're here," Moira responds, her tone is biting and sarcastic.

Erik raises a single eyebrow. "I have made no pretence as to why I am here, Agent MacTaggert," he tells her. The formal wording makes her flinch ever so slightly.

"That was petty of me, Erik. Forgive me. You're right, it would be best if we could work together civilly," she agrees, pulling herself together and inclining her head. "What did you wish to talk with me about?"

Erik takes a breath and reminds himself yet again to stay calm no matter the woman's response to his next question. "Are you afraid of me, Moira?"

The question takes her aback for a moment, and she has to swallow before answering. "Yes, I am. Your abilities are very strong, and useful against soldiers and civilians alike. You are a warrior with a mission, and you will not let anything get in your way - and that scares me. The fact that you could kill us all in our sleep effortlessly, with no way for me to fight back - that scares me too." She meets his eyes for the first time since they met on the boat. "You are a very dangerous man, Erik".

It takes a moment for him to register the fact that everything metal in the room is very slightly vibrating and then another to stop it. Taking a deep breath he continues, "And the children? Do the children scare you?"

Moira pauses to consider his question carefully, and then answers. "Not the children themselves, per-se. More what they can do. Alex especially, things are destroyed when he loses control. It's not hard to think about the what ifs."

It takes some time for everything that Moira has said to sink in. "I will tell you this. None of the children, or Charles, would ever hurt you on purpose. If they hurt you accidentally, it would hurt them too. That is the truth," he tells her.

He is halfway to the door before she asks, "And you?"

Erik turns around to face her and looks her in eye as he responds, "Don't get in my way, and it won't be a problem."

The agent goes slightly pale at this, but nods her head. "I understand."

He walks out of her room to see Charles standing a few doors down, having a conversation with Raven. He inclines his head to them as he passes on his way to his own room.

A/N: When this fic reaches 100 review you all get a prezzie!


	5. Leap of faith

A/N : We hit 100 reviews *faints and revives herself* I can not believe all the feedback and encouragement that you have all given me, as I updated this 186 emails went out *Faints agian*. Your present is a pre-view of dark!Charles with hints of where this story is going to go and is at the bottom of the chapter, I'm going to shut up now and just let you read.

Beta: Louise Hargadon- Your awesome don't let anyone tell you otherwise, and I gave dark!Charles stubble just for you XD.

Disclaimer: In some alternate reality I own X-men, but here alas I do not.

Warnings: Slash

_**Peace Was Never An Option**_

_**Chapter Five: Leap of Faith**_

It is before daybreak when Charles makes his way into Erik's room. He has just closed the door when, to his horror, he sees a sharp blade dangerously close to his throat, the knife floating in the air.

"Charles? What are you doing?" Erik's voice has not even a hint of the fact that he was sound asleep just moments ago.

"Perhaps you could?" Charles begins, his voice cracking slightly as he gestures towards the knife.

Erik blinks rapidly, as though confused before realising what Charles is asking. He nods sharply and returns the blade to his hand. As he replaces it under his pillow he asks again "What are you doing here? Is something wrong?" he asks. He has already pulled on a jumper and is getting up before the other mutant can respond.

"No, no. Everything's just fine. I was just hoping that we could finish the conversation that we started yesterday that's all," the telepath attempts to smile at the other man.

"Really, now?" the metal manipulator has relaxed back into the bed again, but there is still tension to his frame.

"I think that now would be the best time, no chance of interruptions this way." Charles explains. He isn't going to let Erik get out of it this time.

"Very well then. Have a seat," Erik agrees. He gestures toward the chair, but Charles takes a seat on the edge of the bed. The only reaction Charles gets is Erik's lifted eyebrow and a twitch of lips that may have been classed as a smile on anyone else.

"You can ask whatever you want Charles, but I cannot assure you that you will get an answer," Erik tells him. The professor finds himself captivated once again by those eyes, so dark and mysterious.

"Fair enough I, suppose. Now, first things first. What is this about you not expecting to live though the fight with Shaw?" Ever since Erik had let that slip, Charles' mind has been obsessing over it.

"Straight for the jugular, huh, Charles?" Erik responds. He shakes his head and takes a deep breath. "You have to understand, that for almost as long as I can remember, my one purpose in life has been to kill Shaw. I have never thought of a life beyond that, never hoped to have a reason to think beyond that." Erik is looking straight into his eyes and his mind is completely open to him.

"And now? Do you have a reason to look beyond that now?" the telepath holds his breath, waiting for the answer.

"You tell me Charles, do I have a reason?" Erik asks, his eyebrow lifting again. Charles has to break the stare between the two of them at that point and begins to worry at his lips with his teeth.

"Erik, you need to understand that-" here he has to pause to find the words, "That I haven't felt like this about anyone before, let alone another man." Charles just knows that he is blushing like a schoolgirl talking to her crush.

"But you don't deny that there _is _something between us?" and Erik's hand comes up and ever so gently raises Charles face until they are once again looking at each other.

"No I can't deny it, but neither can I label it, I don't know what it is and damn it, Erik - that scares me!" There is heat in his voice now.

"You don't like not being in control, do you, Charles?" Erik asks. Damn him for sounding so amused! "Why can't we simply see where it leads us? Take a chance for once in your life Charles!" Erik implores him, and Charles knows that he's putting it all on the line here.

"Take a chance on you?" and his voice is soft now as though what's budding in the air could break at any moment.

"Yes Charles, trust me. Like I already trust you," Erik's voice too is soft – so unlike him.

"You trust me?" Charles asks, slightly surprised. The telepath knows exactly how hard it is for the metal manipulator to trust in others after having his trust broken time and time again.

"I'm here, aren't I? I could have left that night, but I didn't. God knows, it wasn't the CIA that I trusted!" There is something approaching a true smile on Erik's face as he finishes the sentence.

"I do trust you Erik. I trust you with the children, and to have my back," Charles assures him. He is so shaken by Erik's words that he is left reeling, trying to hang on to the control of this conversation.

"But will you trust me with your emotions? I'm not asking for a declaration of love, Charles – that's really not my style. Just a chance to see if whatever this is can work."

It takes Charles a moment to realise that, sometime during that speech Erik has taken his hand in his own.

"A chance then. I can do that – provided that you open up to me a bit more too. This has to be a two-way street to work. Do we have a deal?" he tries his hardest to make sure that Erik can not see his uncertainty in his smile

"Deal," Erik agrees. Charles is overwhelmed by the beauty of the true smile that lights up Erik's face. "May I kiss you?" he suddenly asks, the slight flush on his cheeks giving away his nervousness.

"I think I would like that," Charles answers, barely louder than a whisper. He leans forward into Erik's personal space and closes his eyes just as Erik's lips touch his own, so soft and chaste, a barely-there pressure that somehow lights all his nerves on fire.

"Now, then. What questions did you want to ask me?"

_xmenxmenxmen_

Erik sits alone in the library, seemingly in another time and place. The only sign that some part of him was still present is the coin weaving between his fingers, when Raven enters the room.

"Am I interrupting?" she begins. She is half-in, half-out of the room, ready to leave at the smallest sign that she is not wanted.

The metal manipulator gives a little start and then focuses his attention on her. "Not at all Raven. Was there something you wanted?" he asks, pleasantly. The coin has now vanished.

The metamorph enters the room and closes the door. "I was just wondering why you pulled that stunt the other day?" she blurts out. She has to remind herself that no matter how forbearing Erik looks, Charles wouldn't let him actually hurt her.

"I presume that you are referring to the training weights?" He allows himself a small smirk. He had been wondering if she would confront him about that.

"I am referring to the fact that you could have killed me!" she's not quite yelling but is close.

"I knew you could lift it Raven, I would not have done it if I thought otherwise." Honestly, he finds the show of temper amusing. "Your true form allows you to do things that no ordinary human could even imagine."

Raven ducks her head a little at the praise. "Don't you find it ugly though? Everyone else does," she tells him. There is self loathing in her tone.

"Not at all Raven. Rather, I find it beautiful - because it is the true you. Why do you feel you have to live a lie? I understand out there, but in here amongst friends? You should never feel you have to hide from us," he reassures her. Erik knows what it is like to live a lie, and doesn't want anyone else to have to go though that.

"You really think that?" she asks, there is hope on her face now.

"I do not say what I do not mean, Raven. Perhaps you should think on what form _you _feel happiest in, rather than what form others like you best in," he suggests, sending a gentle smile her way to reinforce to message.

"That's a good idea. Thank you, Erik," she answers, happily, sending a smile back at him before leaving with a spring in her step.

_xmenxmenxmen_

Charles has just finished a training session with Alex, when Raven comes up to him and gives him a hug.

"You know, once you get past the dark broodiness of him, Erik's not so bad!" she tells him. She gives a little giggle at Charles' bemused expression, and then flows over towards Alex. "You know boxing, right?" she asks him.

"Yeah, a little. I know how to throw a punch, at least. Why?" Alex asks, puzzled.

"I want you to teach me, duh!" Raven giggles again at the looks on both of their faces. "Come on, Alex. It'll be fun!"

"Professor?" he asks, warily, looking at Charles to see if he objects to Raven's suggestion.

"Please, Alex, call me Charles! I think it would be a good idea for all of us to learn some hand-to-hand," he agrees.

"Groovy!" Raven declares, then laughs at Charles' grimace at her saying the word. "Let's go, Alex!"

"I'll see you both at dinner tonight!" Charles finishes the conversation by waving them off.

He searches for Erik's mind before finding him in the library.

_xmenxmenxmen_

"Can you tell me why Raven is acting like a giggly schoolgirl?" is the first thing that Charles asks when he enters the room.

"Why, hello to you too, Charles! How has your day been?" Erik responds, a friendly tone to his voice that lets Charles know that it's just banter.

"Hectic, if you really must know. Now - Raven?" Charles slips into the matching chair opposite of Erik, the chessboard between them still set up from a previous game.

"We had a conversation. What she's been doing since then, I have no idea," he answers, evidently disinterested in the conversation. He inclines his head towards the chessboard. "Did you want a game?"

"Not at the moment, thank you," Charles responds, rather curtly, but finally lets himself relax into the chair. "Do I want to know what you were talking about?"

"Do you know why she doesn't take her natural blue form here?" Erik answers a question with a question. Charles sighs. He knows exactly why.

"That's my fault, I'm afraid. When we were younger, I was rather paranoid about her letting her cover slip. I think perhaps she took it to mean that I find her natural form ugly," he explains. He sighs again but quickly gathers his emotions together. "Does that have something to do with your conversation?"

"It does, but rather than going over everything said, I will just say that I told her that I find her blue form beautiful, and that I meant it in a purely platonic way," he answers. It is clear from his wording that Erik is still aware that this new 'thing' that they have going is still fragile.

"I am glad that someone could reassure her where I have failed so dismally," Charles responds, as he rubs at his temples where a headache is starting to set in.

Erik stands and makes his way behind him, his long fingers taking over smoothly.

"You still have time to fix it Charles, don't worry. There's plenty of time. For now, though, just rest," he advises, his voice barely above a whisper. Charles finds himself heading toward sleep, content with knowing that the minds of the children are happy and calm; and that the strong reassuring hands of someone he cares for are deeply massaging his head and shoulders.

"Rest, Charles. The world can wait for a few hours," Erik tells him, his voice deep and calm. Eventually, Charles is aware of nothing but darkness, as sleep finally overtakes him.

_**Preview **_

Charles stands at the window, looking out on the children training outside and runs his hand over his face - the stubble creating an unpleasant scratching on his hand reminds him that he should shave one of these days.

"Having second thoughts Charles?" Erik comes up behind him moving stiffly and with caution, still feeling the effects of his injuries from Cuba.

"They deserved what came to them, they should not have attacked us" and if there is venom in his voice it is because those he cared for were at risk and that is something he does not tolerate well.

"Even so, you killed with your power for the first time" and Erik uses the metal in his watch to get the telepath to turn and face him. "Are you really ok with that?"

Charles reaches up and places his hand on Erik's face " I watched you almost die because of my misplaced belief, I will not let that happen again. Even if it means watching the world burn"

Erik just smiles at him "And together we will raise a new world from the ashes"

A/N: So there you go, tell me what you think? If this story reaches 200 reviews I'll write a one-shot pre-view.


End file.
